Thursday, July 24, 2008
By the way, lot of things happened in last one year or so : got busy, gained weight, got married, gained weight,traveled lot, gained weight. did something, gained weight, did nothing, gained weight, did everything, gained weight,gained weight, gai..... More so, of late, the weight gains have been in geometric progression.
In this last one year, Moi has also grown wiser - Moi knows that you would not accept this fact. But, sure you would have believed without batting an eyelid on Moi's lie about the weight gain...hummm...human nature!
Anyways, so after this brief hiatus, Moi has decided to start writing again,.
Oh, that's a thunderous applause..... thanks, but Moi knows that he has lost all his readers, but hoping to get them back by posting regularly :)
Come back soon to see a post on "Is it soda or dosa?"
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Love is a symbol of eternity.
It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end.There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage...and
When I met Soundari, I knew I got the righ...wait...wait...we are getting married! period!
Let lack of information or miscommunication shall not be the reason for not attending! and...I don't entertain other reasons too...btw.
Puleese attend the wedding and be part of the celebration.
Forgive me folks if I did not come and invite you in person. Puleese consider this as my personal invitation and it will be a great you are able to make it to the reception on 31st or wedding on 1st or both.
To all those whom I din call/mail and update the happenings :
Its been a busy month of Jan - I had my house shifted from native and I am (sort of) settled (settling?) down in Choolaimedu,Chennai with my parents. Last week had been soopar busy - I ishtarted my wedding purchases only then. lasht minit as ushual! Everything done, except for a hairdo and a shave( to get ready for ishtanding and ismiling hopelessing in front of the camera)
wokay, now coming to the point,
the wedding is in Murthy Mahal, Arcot Road. If you know the Vadalplani signal then its pretty easy ( if you dont know, pls know it and read further).
Jesht go further down towards Porur on the Arcot Road, you will find the Murthy Mahal on your RHS ( right hand side) opposite to the new Mega Mart and just besides Alwarthirunagar bus stop.
All bachelors and ex-bachelors looking at celebrating the day with soma bhanam , let me know ( i gottu arrange things separately for separate groups u knoww)
Otherwise, catch you on Jan 31st night during the reception or 1st Feb. (morning 9 -10:30 is the wedding)
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Yes, at last Moi had found time to post something here…Thanks to blogging world for giving a standing ovation and breaking into thunderous applause even before reading the post…hee hee…
Moi wanted this post to happen several weeks ago , but the fact is, he was too busy with his official duties and when ever he found some free time to put something on the blog, he was called for some extreeemly urgent work. Actually, every other task Moi does, would have “high priority and extreeemly important and urgent” tag attached to it. He has developed an unique ability of converting even a normal day-to-day mundane task into an extreeemly urgent one – the name of the game is procrastination. Every work he does, so is, extreeemly urgent and important ones. All his today’s tasks would have had the deadlines either yesterday or the day before yesterday or last week or at times, last month,last year or even sometime during his previous birth.So, you readers of this blog, if you wanted to do only extreeemly important work, then, you are one of those mortals who require some help from Moi.
The mortals – who always wanted to become perfect human - at some point of time in their life, resorted to one technique or other to improve themselves to achieve perfection. With lot of books on self improvement mushrooming in the market claiming to help these mortals, Moi thought , why not he write something on the same lines - afterall he had been written off by so many well-wishers saying that he had no room for self improvement which means that he had already attanied perfection. He decided to write about a technique that will improve everybody’s life, that will be easy to follow, that will reap quick results, and most improtantly, the one that he followed in all walks of his life. Unlike all self improvement gurus, who only preach but not practice and took examples from other’s life when they preched, Moi decided to tell the world what he followed relgiously and decided to quote anecdotes from his life to support the cause. Having said so, it is up to the ignorent reader to take the learnings out of the post and start particing the technique. The techinique of “ achiving perfection by countering procastination”
Moi mastered the art and science of procrastination before his birth and actually, had put that into practice during his birth. Amma carried him for an extra 10 days ( that’s 10 months and 10 days you knoww…) before the doctor decided that a normal delivery was out of question and only an operation could bring him out. But Moi decided at the last moment that it would be a normal delivery and after giving several false pains to his amma, he surprised everyone by choosing a full, un-adultered ( neranja ) raahu kaalam on a bright sunny Saturday to see the world for the first time. His birth still stands a testimony for Moi’s pencent in achieving perfection in procrastination.
His school days were fun and he, subconsciously, continued achieving perfection in procrastination during this time. Normally, the homework assignments were supposed to be written at home but there were 2 groups of students who always wrote the assignments in the classroom. Both the groups followed the same technique of completing the assignments when the class was going on by having the home work notebook on the lap and scribbling fast on it without being noticed by the teacher. The only difference was the assignment they wrote and the date of submission. The studious, enthusiastic group wrote the assignments that were to be submitted the next day, that was given by the teacher the previous hour. The “procrastination” group wrote the assignments that were to be submitted the next hour. There were times, when Moi even had the narrowest of the escapes when he had just finished his homework when the teacher would be correcting/collecting the front bencher’s home work assignments. Recently, when Moi knew that the Japanese were following a similar technique and reaped huge benefits in their supply chain activities and called it as “JIT “– “Just in time inventory”, he was overwhelmed that his group were pioneers in JIT even during the school days.
Moi developed the habit of studying for the exams in the 11th hour when he grew a millimeter taller than his appa’s shoulder.( that was way too quick, it was in his 8th std…wink..). Even in the exam days,
During preparation - he played till it was too late in the night, started studying only when others started sleeping, gulped as much Horlicks possible during this “day before the exam midnight study” saga, procrastinated mugging formulae thinking that leaning by heart during fresh mornings will increase the probability of him remembering the formulas, but slept till it was too late in the morning, forgot hall tickets, pens, pencils etc,
During examination - looked at the question paper and almost sat still for the first 15 mins to regroup himself and get the rhythm going, derived all formulas as he did not mug them and tried all difficult questions until it was too late to write the known easy ones, attained full speed in writing only when the last bell rang that announced that only half an hour was left, scribbled all known answers in the last moment and came out of the hall without even knowing if the question paper was tough or easy
post examination – he went home riding his bicycle with group of 10 friends, slept for next 5 hours with full satisfaction as if he had done something great that day, got up, played till it was too late in the night ….and the same routine continued…
Miraculously, procrastination was never an issue for him as it had already become a part of his life and he was some how getting decent grades and few times, even surprised every one by being a topper in few subjects.
So the student readers:
- Waste your day time & study at the last moment by staying awake in the night, by burning your midnight oil. Get used to nocturnal life. It would come handy when you end up being a night watchman.
- Don’t learn formulae by heart. Your friends would do that and can get good marks, but you gather the much needed knowledge. Knowledge is wealth. Try to derive the formulae when you write exams. Trust Moi, its interesting and it has only 2 outcomes. It might either lead you nowhere or it might lead you to a revolutionary equation that would open up a new school of thought.
In job, procrastination is an integral part of time management. It throws up lots of benefits – It helps in prioritizing work, it is an escape strategy and above all, it helps you feel that your job is very important for the company. Procrastinators are real assets in any team and are generally lazy geeks who always work on finding the easiest way to finish any task.
It is not difficult to find a procrastinator in the team. They use the following phrases frequently during the interactions
- "We are working on it" means" We have not yet started working it"
- "Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means" It’s not getting done, At least not till tomorrow!”
- "Lets call a meeting and discuss" means" I have no time to talk now"
- "We can always do it" means" We cannot do it on time"
- “We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "We screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."
- "You should have told me earlier" means" Well even if you told me earlier that would not have mattered, I cannot complete it now !"
In general, it’s always good to have at least one procrastinator in the team so that the team would get fine tuned with help of this proven fighter and it defies logic to have a perfect team.
When you think of procrastinators, you can find a common thread that binds every one of them. They are either working on something in a feverish pace or sit idle. They do marginally useful things, like watering the plants or cleaning the inbox or writing comments on a blog ( wink…) at the normal pace when it is not a time bound issue. If all that procrastinator had to do is to clean the inbox at 3:00 PM daily for 2 hours and if the work was to be inspected at 7::00 PM by a superior, then nobody on earth could get him do it at right time. They simply cannot do a work which they were supposed to do – on time.
As a reader, at this point, you may feel that procrastination requires a certain amount of self-deception. All the self help books will advice a procrastinator to understand and commit himself to tasks with inflated importance and pseudo deadlines, while making himself feel that they are important and urgent. This way, he would be able to do the less urgent and less important tasks. But these books easily forget that virtually all procrastinators have excellent self-deceptive skills..So, If you ever think of coming out of this habit, please get all your tasks prioritized.
If you have already started being true to yourself and devised a plan to come out of it – please procrastinate it, else, you will lead a peaceful and productive life!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
When Moi was a kid, he ate cashew nuts, dry grapes, pottu-kadalai, mixture of horlicks + sugar (apdiyeh saapduven!), thenga thuruval + sugar etc in the premise of assisting amma while she cooked the dinner. He also had the perseverance and experience of tasting all the items at every stage of its Work In Progress. He knew how a dish tasted in different stages when getting cooked. He would not let the dosais come out of kallu (apdiyeh saapduven!) and tasted everything that was in kitchen – literally everything - including but not limited to uncooked, quarter cooked, semi cooked, cooked, fully cooked items. He, in-fact learnt the theory of heat transfer practically by seeing how the heat got transferred from a hot dosai to a cold dosai when kept one above the other. Moi’s dinner time at home was 7:30 PM and whatever happened, he was supposed to go to bed before 8:30. It was (and still is) a simple south Indian Brahmin household dinner that was either white rice with sambar and rasam or chappatis or pooris or idlis or dosas. Invariably, the dinner always ended with a thiyer saadham ( curd rice). No meal is complete without a curd rice you knowww….
The first time Moi cooked his dinner was when he was in his 7th std when his appa and amma were out of town for a day or two. He always had his sister - a scapegoat – standing spell bound besides him during whatever experiments he does in the house. The rava upma they prepared was undercooked and he consoled himself that being “under aged” was the problem and everything would be fine in another 10 or 15 years. That was the first and last time he had tried his hand in cooking till he joined his Engg college.
During his Engg college days, Moi shared a three bedroom apartment with seven roommates. Of the seven, couple of them were really good cooks. These two gurus took up the responsibility of cooking the dinner and it was agreed that rest six would perform the associated duties of cleaning the utensils, grinding the flour, shop vegetables, groceries etc apart from eating stomach full. The sishyas took turns in performing the duties and Moi somehow made sure that he turned ill or had important assignments to write when it came to his turn. All the fellow room mates were equally lazy to an extent that three guys shared single plate during dinner (reduction in number of plates to be washed u knowww….) On paper, the room had eight people residing in it; but the gang in which Moi was an integral part had more members and unfortunately all of them had big appetite and number of people who started having dinner in the room grew steadily. At one point of time the there were 14 and it looked like a typical bachelors mess/hotel. Post meal, the apartment looked like a mortuary when all 14 slept covering their faces in the living room (as hall had the music system and every body wanted to listen to music). Though the gang loved eating and spending time together, this set-up continued only for a year because of fights and disagreements between the sishyas on sharing the duties. The gang shifted its base to a near by Andhra mess which provided unlimited meals. ( The Andhra mess welcomed the guys without knowing that it was the last day that it enjoyed an sizeable operating profit….man…the rendezvous with the Andhra mess was fun and would definitely require a dedicated post in the blog).
During his saidapet stint , Moi had his dinner in Logu mess, setu chappati kadai, amma mess, valarmathi mess ( ask any bachelor in west saidapet..these hotels would defenitely feature in their list of favourite hotels). During his MBA days, Moi was staying in a PG ( paying guest accomodation) and shared his room with his long time friend – selvaraj ( who is now in US and claims that he has become a great cook). The PG food can be eaten only when it was hot (Medical reports ?!! say that the tounge had less chance of recognicing taste when the food is served hot.) Moi and Selva ate outside in hotels and that was the beginning of Moi’s long standing relationship with the hotels and bachelor mess’s in chennai. In
Parata ( its Barota here in chennai) , dosais and idlies where his staple dinner and man…naaku sethu pochu. Moi and his roommates longed for the homemade dinner and so, decided to make their own dinner ( koozoh, kanjiyo…nammaleh senji saapdalaam macha…).
Ask Moi what his perfect dinner would be…No second thoughts, he would come up with
Urulaikezangu poriyal ( potato fry)
Arisi appalam ( rice pappad)
Thaalichu kotina more (butter milk)
poo maadri white rice
Oorgai ( pickle)
Whatever be it – a romantic candle night dinner ( Moi had candle night dinners when there were power cuts in his house) or beggar style “plate carrying” buffet dinner or any type for that matter; cant even think of competing with the above menu when its home prepared. The real taste is when you sit on the floor and eat them in front of the idiot box.
Though Moi always believed that he had the art and chemistry, physics, biology of cooking running in his blood, he never hesitated asking for a 1st level telephone support during cooking.
“Ayio, Amma…what now? Its boiling…should I add the vegetable now…or later…” and amma would scream from the other end “ dei, your voice is breaking, come out of kitchen” and Moi always doubted if ever amma knew that one has to be in kitchen to cook!
Moihas slowly picked up the systematic way of cooking and what he lacks now is consistency in taste. It takes atleast an hour to prepare a simple dinner. Now, Moi and his roommates face the daily challenge of cleaning the utensils and keeping the kitchen neat and tidy.
From his cooking stints, Moi understands the fact that to cook – as a task - is itself tough, but the tougher is to cook 3 times a day without loosing enthusiasm and to consistently maintain the taste; the toughest is when the whole effort is not recognised by those who eat. The whole world knows that Moi admired thaaikulams (the young ladies in particular).Now his admiration towards them has increased multifold and spl round of applause and recognition to those ladies who go to office and as well perfome their duties as homemakers. You people are amazing and it’s impossible for a guy to be as patient and hardworking as you are!
As you listen to the applause, Let Moi go and prepare the dinner…
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Very hilarious....njoy maadi!!!
The original inhabitants of ancient
In olden times there were two big families in
In midevil times
After the Mowglis came Vasco the Gama. He was an exploder who was circumcising
Eventually, the British came to overrule
In 1920, Mahatma Gandhi was married to one wife. Soon after he became the father of the nation. In 1942 he started the Quiet India moment, so named because the British were quietly lootoing our country. In 1947,
Monday, March 19, 2007
In Moi’s case, he had scaled the height of 183 cms when he was in his late teens – that’s exactly 6 feet for you!
Vairamuthu had once written in one of his songs: Aaradi uyaram azagiya uruvam apple pola irupaaneh! and that translates to “6 foot tall, handsome physique, looks like an apple” – sorry, tried a literal word-to-word translation and also hard to imagine someone looking like an apple…anyways; coming back to the topic, being taller is both a boon and a bane – especially in India. The taller are constantly reminded that they are taller than the lot (btw…is 6 feet tall enough to be called tall???!!!).
Being tall, Moi has experienced several height related issues in his life.
- Teacher: stand in the last row…. don’t you see other boys who are shorter than you are standing behind you!
- Someone to other one in the neighborhood: Oh that
Saar! One who is tall! I am sure you are asking about the tall saar! rite?
- Someone sitting behind in the movie hall:
Saar! pls bend a little saar! I am unable to see the movie!
- Someone standing behind in the temple: Thambi! You are blocking the God (????) come back!
- Old aunties: you taller than what you were last time…if you grow like this, you will break the ceiling… ha ha… ha….
- Everybody: dei, will you help me out by taking that box from that top shelf?
- Moi’s friends: dei, RX100 is too small for you da…why din’t you buy some other vehicle.
- All aunties & uncles: It’s tough to find a girl for you.
Though Moi had only a “smile” as the answer for all these comments/questions, he always had a secret desire of giving back strong to them.
Leave alone how the society perceives you, the guys who make the doors, ceilings, chappals, cars, pants, shirts, chairs, cots, beds, seats in buses - somehow comfortably forget that there are people who are more than 6 and they always miss couple of inches in everything because of being couple of inches tall.
Hey short ones!
- Have you ever experienced sleeping in a cot not being lengthy enough to fit you and that you have to bend your knees to fit in and sleep in it?
- Have you ever seen a movie with your bum on the edge of the seat but head on the usual place?
- Do you know how it feels to bend down to speak face – to – face?
- Have you ever sat continuously in “Z” shape during long bus journeys?
The tall ones (generally a very intelligent species) always have been sacrificed when it comes to anything and everything. The majority species (the short ones – generally less intelligent than the longer version) always had the numbers at their advantage. This majority has been oppressing the minority for a long period of time and it’s high time that the tall ones fight for the basic need – a few inches more in all things they use! Few inches more in the cot’s length, few more inches of leg space in the car etc…
Join hands the tall few....Lets make it happen!!!
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Moi’s appa was given a “NLC fone” connection and that was when Moi started ta( l )king the world in his stride with his teletalk skills. He used the NLC fone for all known and unknown purposes in the world. Moi had more than 10 friends with whom he would talk daily over the fone. Imagine if he spends half an hour per call ( in call centre language – its “average call handling time of 30 mins”) and handles 10 calls daily – Man… its 5 hours on phone, that’s almost all his ”non-sleep” hours at home. No wonder why amma and appa, had several times, “kindly advised” him to stop the telecons and start concentrating on his studies. There were instances when someone from the exchange would interrupt the unending conversations “requesting” him to stop overusing the facility. He, undeterred by all these kind advices and requests, continued his "phone-a-friend" act. NLC fone and Moi were inseparable till he finished his schooling. It was a huge relief for appa and amma when he got into an engineering college far away from Neyveli– atleast his non stop nonsense on fone would stop.
His college days were exactly opposite to his school days as far as his telephone was concerned. Moi’s hostel had 2 floors with more than 50 rooms. But it had only one phone in the ground floor that had the outgoing facility barred. There was a ladies hostel/paying guest accommodation behind his hostel. Romeos from hostel had their Juliets residing there with telephone being the only means of communication during the nights. Parents found it difficult to reach their dear sons on the phone as the it was kept engaged 24x7. Be it day, night, dawn, dusk, IST, PST, GMT or whatever time zones you are in, you can find one of those Romeos speaking at the lowest possible volume with their respective Juliet. The phone room was in a pathetic state – understandably because it was actually the motor room which also served as a makeshift phone room. The room had neither ventilation nor a fan and only thing that circulated inside was the high velocity hot air that came out of the hairy nostrils of our Romeos. Till then, Moi was actually under an impression that nobody - living or dead - can beat his skill, stamina and temperament when it comes to non stop nonsense on telephone. It was a perfect déjà vu whenever he saw the phone room – some one or the other was on the phone speaking at his lowest possible volume. He was no more proud of his telephone speaking skills and slowly understood that he was “bacha”,” podi paiyan”, ( naïve , starter) if compared with all love struck Romeos when it comes to speaking on a phone.
It was during Moi's business school days, a new obsession – SMS took over the student community .Moi - student way BPL - was running with prepaid connection from Hutch that had “free SMS after 9 PM” bonus scheme. His Nokia 3315 was specially designed to serve only 2 purposes. 1) receive calls 2) Send and receive SMSs.He stopped speaking over the phone and started SMSing his near and dear and near and not so dear and everybody who owned a mobile. Thanks to the SMS culture, his eng noledj went in2 drain & da spl mistks ver praisd & termd as srtcuts. Moi had shrtcuts 4 al da wrds in eng and his typin speed was so fast dat ppl strted belvin dat Moi mus hav pased hier lvl in da SMS typin xam. It took long time for him to come out of SMS language syndrome and start writing his full name without using shortcuts. Though Moi hardly sends any SMS nowadays, he still would rank in top 100 in Chennai when it comes to SMS typing skills.
The first fully automatic mobile phone system, called MTA (Mobile Telephone system A), was developed by Ericsson and commercially released in Sweden in 1956.MTB, an upgraded version with transistors - weighing "only" 9 kg, was introduced in 1965 and used dual-tone multifrequency signaling. MTB was also commercialized and it had 150 customers in the beginning and 600 when it shut down in 1983. People who have been trying to reach Moi on his current mobile phone always doubted if it were one of those 600 MTB pieces. Infact, everybody knew that Moi’s mobile used the latest “no signal, echo enabled, and weak battery” technology. He gets all his important calls only when the mobile detected weak or no signal or at the time when the battery ran out of charge. When his mobile had both full signal and full charge, it promptly threw a soooper duuuper echo effect that dutifully created an acoustically brilliant cacophony. Friends who were lucky to catch a conversation with him, say that he is awesome on phone (May be, it’s their way of telling that he is dumb face-to-face).Moi somehow manages his calls by diverting them to his landline or his roomies phone.
For all who have been advising him to buy a new mobile – who knows, when he gets lucky to have a Juliet to make endless, meaningless conversations over phone , he might have a valid reason to replace his MTB with a better model. So, please get a Juliet for him or at least present him a mobile phone on his birthday!